As a college student, missing those back home is only natural. Usually two months can go by without seeing those from our past who’ve influenced so much who we’ve become. The ones who know us better than we know ourselves. The ones who love us, bad habits and all. Two months may seem like an eternity, especially to a new(ish) college student who has never spent more than two weeks away from home.
But this year, I faced a challenge I saw coming but knew would be hard regardless of how I handled it.
Missing the ones you love is one of the most uncomfortable feelings in the world. Missing people doesn’t necessarily mean you are unhappy. In fact, for me, I am quite happy living out my dream. It is just a feeling I have to adjust to living with.
Missing someone is hard to describe. I’ve never really had to miss anyone before. I always knew it wouldn’t be long before I saw them again. So dealing with this new emotion was like trying to navigate a new territory in the dark. Not impossible, but unpredictable and a little frightening.
I had a teacher who had to describe the different levels of love to us for a religion class in high school. She said when you reach the level of true love, it is not “absence makes the heart grow fonder,” but rather “absence makes the heart ache.”
What she meant was that you know love someone when you feel a certain pain when that person is gone. And while I may not be talking about the same kind of love she was talking about, I do know that I really love the people I am missing because I feel that certain kind of pain.
Missing someone isn’t just wishing they were with you when you are doing something or thinking you need to tell them about something crazy that happened when you talk to them next.
No, that feeling of missing someone hits you like a ton of bricks when you are riding the bus, or see a mother and her child smiling in the springtime sunshine or watching a father and son bonding over a baseball game or laughing about something you know that someone would find funny too.
Missing loved ones makes you realize how empty you feel without them in your daily life. Their love fills you like the aroma of freshly baked cookies fills a kitchen. You don’t really notice when it’s not there until you smell it (or feel it) again. And then you realize how truly sweet it makes your life.
Missing someone can cause their name to pop into your head when your mind wanders without control. “Mom.” “Dad.” “Jenna.” “Chelsea.” “Katie.” “Friends from home.” “Bridie and Bailey.”
Missing someone is counting down the days until you see them again and looking forward to doing absolutely nothing except basking in the glow of their love.
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